Originally appeared on E! Online
The force will always be strong between these two.
On the seventh anniversary of Carrie Fisher's death, Billie Lourd shared a moving tribute to her late mother, detailing her grief journey and the ways in which she's chosen to honor Fisher’s legacy since her passing.
"It has been 7 years since my mom died," she captioned her Dec. 27 post, which featured a throwback photo of her a child on the beach with the Star Wars star. "Every anniversary brings a different iteration of my grief. Some infuse me with rage, some make me cry all day long, some make me feel dissociated and empty, some make me feel nothing, some make me feel guilty for feeling nothing, and some make me feel all of those things all at once."
This year, however, the mom of two—who shares son Kingston, 3, and daughter Jackson, 1, with husband Austen Rydell—was greeted by a different feeling: gratitude.
"When I woke up I felt grateful - or griefull if you will," the 31-year-old continued. "Grief has infused my life with a sense of appreciation I had never had before. It makes me soak up every moment of joy as if it were my last."
And that is especially true for every second she spends with her two children, as she added, "Today I was holding my daughter while she was napping in my arms and my eyes welled up with tears of joy. I felt my mombys presence like the warmth of the sun on your skin on a hot summer day. I miss her every day but the cliche is also true - she is with me every day - she infuses my joyful moments with even more joy."
So when looking for a little extra love, Lourd looks skyward.
"As I tell my son, she lives in the stars," the Scream Queens actress concluded. "And she damn sure makes my life sparkle. Sending my love to all my griefers out there. And hoping everyone can feel a little sparkle of griefull among all the feelings grief inevitably brings."
Earlier this year, Lourd accepted a posthumous Walk of Fame star on behalf of her mother—on a calendar date meaningful for any Star Wars fan.
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"The people who knew and loved my mom at Disney and Lucasfilm have made this star on the Hollywood walk of fame to honor her legacy possible," she said in a statement obtained by E! News of the honor. "This moment is about Carrie Fisher and all that she accomplished and what she meant to the world. May the 4th be with you."
