Originally appeared on E! Online
Jussie Smollett is reflecting on the "dark day" that occurred after he reported being a victim of a hate crime — one authorities say never happened.
In 2021, a Chicago jury found the "Empire" alum guilty of five counts of disorderly conduct for falsely telling police in January 2019 that two masked strangers had attacked him on the street while hurling racist and homophobic slurs. Smollett, who maintains his innocence, was in 2022 sentenced to 150 days in jail and was released after six days following an appeal filed by his lawyer.
The actor had turned himself in to police a month after reporting about the alleged hate crime attack, with authorities accusing him of paying two brothers $3,500 to stage the incident.
"That was a pretty dark day because that's when everything clicked to me of what was happening," Smollett told People about his arrest in comments published Sept. 28. "A lot of things tested my strength, a lot of things tested my mental, but the one thing I never lost — I never started thinking that I am somebody that I'm not."
The 42-year-old said there was "no way" the public could believe "a stupid rumor."
However, he added, "I'm not going to sit here and victimize myself and be like 'Woe is me,' because there's so many people that don't have the platform or the resources that I have to protect themselves."
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The actor said he was aware of his own "privilege in this situation."
"That's why there's a certain point where it's just like, I can't hold on to the pain," he continued. "That's why I'm blessed to continue on and make film and make music and do the things that I was put down here by God to do."
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Smollett made his comments ahead of the Sept. 27 release of his new film "The Lost Holliday," which he stars in and directed and which marks his first acting project since his character was written off "Empire" at the end of its second-to-last season in 2019 following the controversy.
Smollett, who underwent outpatient rehab for undisclosed reasons in fall of 2023, continued, "I'm very grateful to be alive and currently on a journey to find true peace. The world would've swallowed me whole had not been for my family."
His siblings, including actress Jurnee Smollett, have rallied behind him amid the legal proceedings and expressed their belief that he is innocent.
"I have to move forward," the actor said. "I must."
An appellate court ruled against Smollett's appeal in a 2-1 decision last December and the case now lies in the hands of the Illinois Supreme Court, which heard arguments in Smollett's appeal earlier this month.
His legal team arguing the actor was improperly charged with the same crime twice and that the trial court was also "influenced by improper aggravating factors" when he received his sentence, NBC Chicago reported at the time.
As he awaits the court's decision, Smollett is also looking ahead to taking on a new role beyond the music and acting realm, and it's one of the reasons he's "still in the game."
"I pray to have a child," he told People. "I can't visualize me not being a father, because I know I'd be a damn good father."
He added, "I'm doing all of this stuff is for my kid, for one day them to read this conversation and just be like, 'Oh, he said that he was doing this for us. And he did.'"
