These 8 essentials can help high achievers avoid anxiety and burnout and live a happy, successful life

For high achievers, happiness doesn't have to be a myth. In fact, it is possible to live a successful life with less stress, worry and burnout.

Psychologist Mary Anderson wrote "The Happy High Achiever" precisely for those who are looking to achieve their goals and still experience a happy, healthy life.

Here are eight essentials she shares in her book that can help you be a happy high achiever.

8 essentials for being a 'happy high achiever'

1. Aim for excellence, not perfection

"Excellence hinges on honoring yourself, mind, body, and spirit, holding space for a range of what success looks like rather than some perfect-or-bust mindset," Anderson writes.

She suggests using this excellence equation when you're working on projects: excellence equals happy, healthy high-achieving.

• Happy: Prioritize positive feelings and behaviors that lower, not increase, your stress levels.
• Healthy: Maintain good practices that keep you healthy, including getting enough sleep and eating well.
• High-achieving: Strive for meaningful goals, but remember that you're human and will make mistakes.

2. Invest in your energy

To boost your energy and avoid burnout, you need to invest in self care, Anderson notes. She came up with an acronym for SELF: sleep, exercise, look forward and fuel.

The acronym stresses the importance of getting a good night's rest, moving your body daily, planning exciting activities with your loved ones and eating nutritious foods that fuel your body.

And when you're working, you can preserve your energy by tackling the toughest tasks first and not overloading your to-do list, she writes.

3. Approach uncertainty with a curious mind

Remind yourself that there will always be some element of uncertainty in life, and aim to embrace it instead of running away from it, Anderson suggests.

"Come what may, you have the problem-solving skills to handle any outcome," she writes.

Equip yourself with positive self-talk that helps you to feel hopeful about possibilities and excited about new opportunities.

4. Develop healthy connections

To be excellent, you need to collaborate with others, Anderson writes. "Even micro-moments of connection can change your trajectory—and someone else's!"

Not to mention that maintaining positive relationships in your life can help you be happier and healthier, according to research being conducted at Harvard.

Find people who make you feel your happiest and support you as you work towards your dreams; Anderson calls them "easy people." Easy people "help you relax and shift your focus from your internal, unhelpful cognitive distortions to the external, reality-based present moment—in which you are appreciated."

5. Replace 'shoulds' with 'cans'

The words you use when speaking about goals matter. Saying phrases like "I should have gone to sleep earlier" or "I should be able to run a marathon" leads with a negative connotation, Anderson writes.

"...this kind of unbalanced self-talk is not helpful. It keeps you stuck without offering constructive action steps for change."

Starting sentences about your goals with the words "I can" springs you into action, according to Anderson.

6. Lead with gratitude

Practicing gratitude often can lead to higher levels of happiness, research shows. This can be especially helpful during difficult times in life.

"If we practice gratitude-based thinking in our toughest moments, we can navigate them with less anxiety and more ease," Anderson writes.

People who have gratitude journals and consistently write in them also engage in habits that lead to greater success like exercising more and getting more sleep, according to researcher Robert Emmons who wrote a book called "Gratitude Works."

7. Celebrate your victories

As a high achiever, you'll be successful often and those moments deserve celebration.

You can go out to dinner, buy yourself a nice gift or take a trip somewhere you've always wanted to go, Anderson writes. You can also choose to journal about how the achievement makes you feel or use the excitement you have to do something nice for someone else, she notes.

The point is that your achievements should be celebrated.

Celebrating your victories can also cause you to "use your memories of past success as fuel as you climb your next mountain."

8. Choose meaningful goals

When you choose goals that matter to you, you're a lot more likely to do the work to achieve them. Having a purpose is one of the most important things for happiness, according to leading happiness expert Arthur C. Brooks.

Anderson encourages you to ask yourself these questions when thinking about what your purpose is:

• What do I want to be able to say I achieved in my life?
• What do I want to be able to say that I contributed to my community, environment, or the world to help make it better?
• How do I want to be remembered by future generations?

"Now is the best time to think about what you want to devote your time, energy and life to in order to build a legacy you value," Anderson writes. "Because now is what we have."

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